Split by social distancing, friends tied by cancer diagnoses finally reconnect after a year apart
Editor’s Note: Delta College photography student Juanita Contreras documented her time with her friend Maria Vargas, whom she hadn’t seen in a year out of precaution due to the pandemic. Vargas, a stage IV ovarian cancer patient, safely welcomed Contreras into her home for a long-awaited visit. This is their story.
My time with Maria was limited as she is filled with appointments during the week that I currently cannot attend with her.
I am glad I visited, however, and spent much needed time with her.
I have not seen her since COVID-19 hit. I took the necessary precautions before visiting to ensure that she was safe.
Maria is a stage IV ovarian cancer patient.
She was diagnosed in 2017 and continues to battle as of today to shrink the tumors that now are attacking her lymph nodes.
She has been off chemo for five weeks now since she has become platinum resistant and is awaiting a new treatment plan.
She offered me some tea and we had a long chat about things we do not often tell anyone who has not faced this. 5
It is like a secret sisterhood in which we only understand each other, when you are tired of hearing how strong you have to be from others, we understand not being strong is exactly what we need when we are together.
Maria talked about how this cancer has affected her life and her family.
She reserves Sundays for dinner with her family as her children work during the week.
Her daughter, Cristina, is a pediatrician at Valley Children’s in Madera and her son, David, is a police officer for NASA in Mountain View.
As you walk though her house you can sense the culture and the things she loves in there.
A wall dedicated to her family and her faith, a small space where she collects Calaveritas (decorative skulls) as a celebration of Dia de Los Muertos.8
She loves that holiday, even dresses up as a Catrina every year, but the most prominent collection Maria has is her beautiful plants.
She has a really good green thumb, and she even sent me home with some cilantro that she grew in her vegetable garden. 3
In our time together we cried, we spoke about the feelings during our diagnosis, the fears of the present, the future at this stage and about our faith.
Life is different before cancer and after cancer. It really changes us, but she continues to be such a strong warrior.
She fights daily, not just with her physical ailments such as arthritis 7, neuropathy that resulted from the chemo, kidney failure and the fluid that constantly fills her abdomen.
She also fights the emotional aspect of this tiring disease, the anxiety and fears that come along with it.
We walked around her house and through her back yard where she showed me all her plants; gardening is her favorite hobby. 4, 6
There is a plant in particular she has inside her home that hangs from the ceiling and it carries itself all the way to the floor. 2
Maria approached this plant saying how sometimes she forgets about the plant, but the plant keeps fighting and continues growing, so strong and beautiful.
Metaphorically, like her in some special way.
The sadness in her eyes, the medication she takes1 and the downfalls of chemo do not bring her spirit down. She continues to be faithful that God will grant her a miracle and I sure hope He does.
She is the rock of her family.
As we sat at her dining table in the newly remodeled and beautiful blue kitchen, Maria said, “I love the sun. I can go out there and stare at it with my face up letting it just shine on me, it is my favorite thing to do; it makes me feel alive.”